17 October 2026 • Holy Matrimony of Justin Schaetzer and Micaela Caples • Genesis 2:21–22; Ephesians 5:25–32
And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and he slept; and He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh in its place. Then the rib which the Lord God had taken from man He made into a woman, and He brought her to the man. (Gn 2:21–22).
In the holy Name + of Jesus. AMEN.
Justin and Micaela, a few minutes ago we sang the hymn you chose, and its last stanza is worth hearing again: “Unless You build it, Father, the house is built in vain.” John Ellerton took those words from Psalm 127, and you have brought them to a place whose very name tells you it was built. That is fitting, because everything here today was built by somebody. The two of you, with your families, have spent months building this afternoon: the flowers, the music, the dresses, fifteen friends standing up beside you.
Most of us think about marriage the same way. It’s something two people build. Find the right person. Make good choices. Communicate. Work hard. If you build it well, it stands. If it falls, you failed. Sounds responsible, right? It is also a crushing weight to lay on two people, because it means everything rests on you.
Genesis tells it differently. God formed Adam from the dust and “breathed into his nostrils the breath of life” (Gen 2:7). Then, for the first time in the whole account of creation, God says something is not good: “It is not good that man should be alone” (Gen 2:18). Adam names every animal. Not one of them is like him. So God does what Adam can’t. “The Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and he slept; and He took one of his ribs” (Gen 2:21).
The Hebrew says God built the rib into a woman. Built. It’s the word you’d use for a house. Adam didn’t design her. He didn’t earn her. He didn’t go out and find her. He was asleep. He woke up to a gift God built from his own side and brought to him.
Of course, marriages weren’t only for that first morning. In a few minutes, two forgiven sinners will promise to love each other until death parts them. Neither of you can keep that promise on your own. And St. Paul raises the bar even higher: “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her” (Eph 5:25). Justin, you can’t meet that measure. No husband ever has. Micaela, Paul asks you to honor your husband “just as the church is subject to Christ” (Eph 5:24). You can’t produce that on a hard day either. And it’s not just the two of you. It’s every husband and wife here, married one year or fifty. If marriage is our building project, the blueprint is beyond us.
But Paul doesn’t stop there. He quotes Genesis, “the two shall become one flesh,” and then he says, “This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church” (Eph 5:31–32). Genesis 2 was always about more than Adam and Eve. Jesus’ marriage to His Church is the original. Every Christian marriage is the copy.
So look again at Adam’s sleep. St. Augustine saw it sixteen centuries ago in The City of God: the sleep of the man was the death of Christ. On Good Friday the second Adam fell into the deep sleep of death on the cross, and a soldier “pierced His side with a spear, and immediately blood and water came out” (John 19:34). From that opened side God built a bride. That is why Paul says Christ gave Himself for the Church “that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word” (Eph 5:26). The water is Baptism. The blood is the Supper. The Church did not design herself or earn her Bridegroom. She was built out of His wound, washed clean, and brought to Him “not having spot or wrinkle” (Eph 5:27). To put it another way, the bride is what Christ’s death made.
Justin and Micaela, you know this already. It was done to you. You were washed in that water. Not long ago you confessed that faith at St. John and received His body and blood at His altar. You are “members of His body, of His flesh and of His bones” (Eph 5:30). Before you belonged to each other, you belonged to Jesus.
That changes what this marriage is. Paul started the reading there: “Walk in love, as Christ also has loved us and given Himself for us” (Eph 5:2). His love comes first. Justin, you won’t love Micaela by digging love up out of yourself. You’ll love her as a man who has been loved from Jesus’ own side. And when you fail her, and you will, you go back to that side, and you’re forgiven. Paul says Christ “nourishes and cherishes” the Church (Eph 5:29). He feeds her. He’ll feed your love for Micaela the same way, at His altar, Sunday after Sunday.
Micaela, Paul doesn’t ask you to make Justin your savior. He couldn’t carry that. He doesn’t have to. “He is the Savior of the body” (Eph 5:23) is said of Jesus alone. The Church honors Christ because she knows where she came from and what He gave for her. Your respect for Justin rests on the same ground: Jesus, who gave Himself for you both.
And when Jesus says, “What God has joined together, let not man separate” (Matt 19:6), hear the first half of that sentence as loudly as the second. God is the One who joins. This afternoon you are not the only ones who say “I will.” God says it over you, and He won’t take back His word.
So we come back to your hymn. “Unless You build it, Father, the house is built in vain.” In a few hours the decorations will come down, and the chairs will be stacked. Human hands built them. But the marriage God builds this afternoon is built the way He built Eve and the way He built His Church: from a side opened in love. It does not rest on how well you build. It rests on Christ, who gave Himself for you. “But nothing breaks the union of hearts in You made one.”
May God grant it in the Name + of Jesus. AMEN.
Rev. Christopher R. Gillespie
St. John Ev. Lutheran Church & School — Sherman Center
Random Lake, Wisconsin